More tips for communicating
Although Mort and I have both written about effective communication with your health care team, it's an important enough topic to continue discussion. Asking specific questions, rather than general ones, will help you make decisions. Here are some additional suggestions:
1. Bring a list of questions to your appointment. Asking "Will I be able to work?" or "Will I be able to play golf?" or "What symptoms and side effects should I expect?" will tell you more than asking "How will I feel?" Sometimes we are so overwhelmed that we simply ask, "What will happen?" That general question doesn't really tell your doctor what your concerns are. Be specific.
2. Take a friend or relative to the appointment so that he or she can help you understand and then follow through on what the doctor has discussed. And take notes so that you can refer to them later.
3. If your doctor drifts into "Medicalese," ask him or her, "What are you really saying? How does this affect ME?" Don't be afraid to speak up if there is something you don't understand.
4. Understand your treatment options very clearly. Ask your doctor to explain the pros, cons, risks and benefits of each proposed treatment.
5. Ask what treatment is now being offered that is state-of-the-art and where you can find it. A comprehensive cancer center may offer options that your doctor doesn't have available.
6. Ask how you can benefit best from treatment. As patients, we have a role to play, too. I would expect that your doctor would tell you to get plenty of rest, decrease your stress, exercise reasonably, eat right, etc.
7. Ask your doctor how and when test results will be reported to you.
8. Ask who is available between appointments to answer questions and when phone calls are returned.
9. Ask how many cases like yours he or she has treated in the past year. If you're not satisfied with the answer, ask who he or she recommends for a second opinion.
Your relationship with your medical team should be viewed as a partnership of individuals who have formed an alliance to attack a common enemy. As with any other partnership, you want the strongest possible partners with whom you can work to accomplish the goal in the most efficient, effective manner. But ultimately, you are in charge of your own decisions about treatments, and no one understands your life or has a greater stake in your health more than you. Thus it is important to become knowledgeable about your disease, to be inquisitive and to be proactive.
Betsy